...after fourteen people were stabbed today at a Texas Community College. All knives should be registered with the government; everyone should undergo a background check before being allowed to purchase dinnerware; all knives now on the market should be dulled and their sharp edges made square; all boy scouts known to possess pen knifes should be immediately disarmed and placed on psychotropic drugs to calm them down; trained police armed with hunting knives should be stationed in every public school; and no one should be allowed to own more than eight knives of any kind. I welcome further suggestions. It's for the children.
I don't see how anyone could object to these proposals. To paraphrase President Obama from his speech in Connecticut today: "We need to do everything we can to reduce the likelihood that our children will be stabbed to death in the streets."
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